I always try to look for something to look forward to. Something to strive for to make my life richer. – Sam Berns, progeria advocate and inspiration to many
Yesterday, I emailed my bosses a formal letter of my intent to discontinue my work from April of this year onward. The one who pulls the strongest string in the game had acknowledged my decision and so it’s final. I would be out of that school in less than two months. The countdown begins.
The decision, believe it or not, had been an easy one as I know what I want and don’t want from a situation anymore. In particular, my working situation as of now. Don’t worry. I’m not gonna go into a long rant regarding my grievances at work because I think overall the good outweighs the bad. Yet, there is such thing as pride and the pursuit of better happiness elsewhere which cemented this choice to leave my home of almost two years (very soon!).
What I expected to be a thrill upon confirmation of my freedom was pretty bland. Of course, I’m happy that there wouldn’t be any problems towards my exit (it seems), but at the same time, I’m scared of what’s life after this phase.
It would be two years, two years, of the same routine and people, comfort and happiness. Believe me, I can dwell so much on that routine of warmth that I know it would be difficult on the following days of being away from it–permanently. Moreover, I visualize this exit as me stepping into a white plain and a blizzard my way. I’m supposed to look forward to this new end as a beginning, right? That’s how my optimistic mind naturally wires for me, but it’s really not taking effect. Not yet at least. Let’s hope it would soon.
Well, I guess I should just chill for now. It’s only the beginning of February and there’s still a lot to do and consider. I don’t have to rush going to abroad because that’s just impossible. No company would hire me that easily without it a bit shady. I have to be realistic about my situation now and just try to find a way around it. Perhaps I also deserve some time off just to think and reflect. I have to visit the temple soon. I also have to study more, fangirl less. Is that even possible? I have to make it possible! It’s so difficult but wjkAsjkBADnsbfkjdbfk;jdsbf LEZGO!