Day 334 – 2018.30.11

It’s a holiday today so it’s a long weekend!

So have I done anything productive?

Uhhh not really.

Haha~ I’ve been spending too much time (again) in the 2wish tag and scavenging for TinCan fics and that’s basically my life. They have a new mini-project! YASSSSSSSSS~

On the other hand, I received news that I’m not the host for our Xmas event at school which is… kind of a bummer. :/

I was actually excited for that because I secretly have this dream of being a host/DJ/voice over and I thought my last year at work was going to give me this memory. On the other hand, the changes were necessary and I can’t really put my tantrums forward.

Not only is my dream position gone, the new responsibility seem more difficult too. Urgh.

It’s kind of like my role as the director and script writer forever during college and highschool, when I actually really wanted to act too. huhu

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Day 333 – 2018.29.11

It was indeed a good fight!

The Thai poll ended between 2wish and Peraya with 49% to 51% with Peraya as the winner.

I’m amazed by this small fandom. Peraya is probably the biggest fish in the sea while 2wish is the small, cute one, but it proved itself that size does not matter when the fight matters!

I’m very proud to be in both fandoms~ And I really appreciate Plan making the time to tweet a comfort message to the fans as well as promoting peace and love between fandoms:

I kind of remember Mean describing Plan as actually caring to the people around him to the point that he’ll forget himself. When he’s in public or even with fans, he seems a little stand-offish but I think his personality is just more reserved compared to Mean who seems very good and bubbly with anyone. I think this is the reason why he’s more visible online because he’s a bit awkward with strangers, which fans technically are. I mean, I can relate to this very well. 🙂

On the other hand… we finished the last of our PTCs so… celebration!!!

Along with my partner and another co-teacher, we dinned in this Michelin-star restaurant that was a boom from two to three years ago: Tim Ho Wan.

A lot of people cued in line for the famous pork buns and other food, maybe.

Inside, I was a bit shocked to discover that it’s not as fancy as I imagined it to be. The menu is quite practical and common like in other Chinese restaurants like North Park which the placemat also serves as the menu. The menu is also quite compact. I suppose they just specialize.

Anyhow, the pork buns were great especially hot.

I’ve eaten it before, but I have a whole new appreciation of it as it was eaten hot this time. Other favorites are:

Fried tofu with pork floss

Crispy fried fish skin in salted egg breading

Spinach and shrimp dimsum

The food was great, but not something I’d rave about or wait in line for. I think I’d come back for it if I’m on a budget since I was also surprised that for it’s stature, it’s quite affordable!

Day 332 – 2018.28.11

I suppose fandom life in the Philippines is kind of similar in Thailand because of the online polls and how fandom power can give projects to actors and actresses they support.

If I picked anything from being a MayWard fan from the previous year up to early this year, is that the idols sort of really owe it to the support of the fans for their projects. Without the clamor, investors would think there’s no demand, ergo, there’s no point in giving exposure to these dreamers in showbiz. Thus, the online polls (no matter how small or big it is), purchasing power, fan visibility in shooting locations and events, social media trends, etc are all taken into consideration in investment, especially for bigger projects. Of course, it’s a bonus if the actors/actresses are talented or their first project already proved their position to play more roles in movies and series, but it’s the fans who would open doors for sponsorship and other opportunities that can raise their value.

So there was an FB poll in which 2wish (Mean and Plan) was up against Peraya (Singto and Krist).

When I saw that, I already expected that Peraya would win. Of course, I support 2wish as my current babies, but I’ve been following Peraya long enough to conclude just how massive their fandom is, and how acknowledged they are not only by fans, but by the Thai entertainment industry as well (let’s base it on their 13 couple awards in the past two years, okay?). So basically, 2wish is still a baby.

I’m not expecting for 2wish to win in this poll, but I’m expecting a good fight at least. I’ve been lurking around Twitter and it seems the always enthusiastic Chinese fans had been working hard since the afternoon, so the vote counts are almost a tie!!!

I will always support Krist and Singto as my first official babies in the Thai fandom, but I always really wish for Mean and Plan to go places as well, so my votes will go to them. Hopefully together first because we just need that closure from the heartbreak of LBC episode 14. Our TinCan heart just bled into Mean and Plan, naturally.

Go fans!

Day 331 – 2018.27.11

I came home to the 2wish tag on twitter being alive and eventful!

Plan was making fun of Earth (Tum in LBC) when Title (Tar) and Mean came up. It’s a little bit of promotion along with personal vendetas so it works.

Earth tagged their little bickering as #LBCwarbegin which ended with Plan teasing Earth too much so he has to buy him bread. ^w^ with Earth not-so-subtly pushing 2wish into the convo, the fans promised to give bread to Earth as gratitude.

So in this war, blood would not be served, it would be bread. There will be bread. Haha~ uwu

Day 329 – 2018.25.11

So I almost had a panic attack today as I was waning on my decision to go through the Japanese online company application.

I’m not sure what’s making me so jittery with it. I think the method is shaking my confidence because it’s new and challenging, it’s heaps more sophisticated than how I handled my previous online classes, and I have to accept the fact that I can’t be as free with topics as it is a business class.

That area sort of worries me.

I’ve banked my career on the fact that I enjoy myself when talking with my students as I teach, but if I have to be stiff about it…urgh… I’m not so sure if I can stay in this company for that long.

There’s also a clause about not working in a teaching industry on or offline for a year if I decide to leave them. Good thing when I sought advice from my friend, she assured me that most companies would include that in an agreement, but most likely would not bother to seek you out when you’ve left.

Well, I surely hope so because I can feel myself not staying in this kind of relationship for a long time. It’s so strict with everything too! I can feel myself suffocating already.

Anyway, I apparently passed the session today so I’m on my final demo.

Did I just waste my time if I pass the next step and suddenly not go through with it?

I’m surely fucking with myself with this. What the hell.

Day 328 – 2018.24.11

Huhuhu~ they just released a 5-second teaser for KongxArthit’s Our Sky episode and I’m shookt.

I just know that the story will be about Kongpope deciding to study abroad, so there’s the rift in the relationship. I just hope this does not end in a sad note or I’ll start thinking about how mentally and emotionally healthy it is for me to stay in Thai BL fandom.

Anyway, we finally get a bed-cuddle scene (we missed that in Sotus S, erm) and perhaps some kiss? Come on! They should be in their 4th year as a couple, Arthit and Kongpope should be living together already, especially after they’ve been open about their relationship, right?

On the other hand, while I always prayed (and had been granted) of my wish for Krist and Singto to have more projects, with this trailer, I suddenly have this wish again of having them together in a series. Them as really good friends and looking so good as an imagine couple is not working as much anymore. We need to have a definite narrative for them! We need them in action, in characters!!!

Huhuhuuhu…where’s Sotus season 3… T_____________T

Day 327 – 2018.23.11

Hingal is real.

I just had 3 PTCs for my kids wherein I talked more because I made the report, and I’m freagin drained!

My voice is almost hoarse at the end of the conferences.

Anyhow, I’m glad that most of my parents are happy where their kids are. It’s just so amusing to realize how much our kids have grown whenever we make these evaluations for them. 🙂

Day 326 – 2018.22.11

More PTCs today!!! Everything went well~ wee!

Anyhow, I continued my application for another online English company. Though I’m more or less on my way to being employed by the other Japanese company, I’m still apprehensive with the strictness they have for the clothes.

I’m fairly a shallow person, so small reasons can make me back out of something.

Anyhow, at this rate, I need any kind of job I can have to earn extra money.

Funny part there is that I when I’m in “English mode” I can be super perky and my accent is way out there. Compared to my normal speaking voice and in Filipino, I seem like a completely different person. So whenever I play back my recordings, I’m like… YUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK! ANG ARTE ARTE!

Ahahahhahah!

Day 325 – 2018.22.11

More PTCs today!!! Everything went well~ wee!

Anyhow, I continued my application for another online English company. Though I’m more or less on my way to being employed by the other Japanese company, I’m still apprehensive with the strictness they have for the clothes.

I’m fairly a shallow person, so small reasons can make me back out of something.

Anyhow, at this rate, I need any kind of job I can have to e

Day 325 – 2018.21.11

So I saw this picture again of Mean and Plan…

It’s a picture during the promotion of “Make It Right The Series” where the two of them were both part of. Who would have thought that this picture is already a foreshadowing of the Tin/Can we love so much now.

I have to admit Mean didn’t stay in my radar, but I remember Plan very well because I thought he looked adorable! He was one of Fuse’s funny gang.

I didn’t snoop so much into the BTS of that show because I was only for the Frame/Book storyline, but I was surprised with the amount of Plan/Mean pictures floating around the net during this period. Like, they look like one of the main couples: having (silly) couple shots, receiving flowers together, being side by side most of the time, etc.

Maybe they are good friends in real life even before the show? I mean, in the series, Champ (Mean) and Wit (Plan) didn’t even have a single scene together! Both of their characters had female partners, too.

So I just had this silly idea:

What if… Mean and Plan actually liked each other secretly even from Make It Right time. But of course they just dismissed it as a simple crush, they won’t work with each other anymore anyway, so they will just enjoy the time together. Then they were paired in LBC and the sparks revived again. This time, Mean becomes more shy with Plan but Plan has become bolder. Not bolder in a sense that he’s going to pursue Mean, but he relishes the chance again. He is being affectionate the way he knows how, which is through teasing on and offline, and Mean just can’t take the feels so he takes a step back if he can, but the adorableness kills him every time. They are still playing a charades of feelings and it’s okay for now.

😀

It kind of reminds me of this one post from MayWard (from the early PBB days) that goes:

Gusto ka niya pero hindi nya pahahalata. (He/She likes you but he/she doesn’t want you to notice.)

Gusto mo siya pero hindi mo sasabihin. (You like her but you won’t say anything.)

Ah…tempting hearts. ❤

Day 324 – 2018.20.11

NO WORK TODAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!

The city where my workplace is located suddenly canceled classes at all levels so even the teachers were dismissed form work. Yay! No more excuse to be lazy with the kids I owe a report for.

On the other hand, my 2wish (Mean/Plan) obsession is escalating and it’s not good! It was the same with Singto and Krist before lol

It’s just always so interesting to learn that these actors are quite different from their roles. Which is good because we know how much of a good actor they are! Mean is nowhere as serious and arrogant as Tin, and though Plan has the mischievousness of Can, he is nowhere as loud and alert as the boy.

Now, I have a weakness when it comes to introverts so in terms of personality, I’m really intrigued with Plan. He’s such a baby face that his “cool” demeanor can seem a bit off plane with the visual. He said he’s actually quite quiet and I have observed that in some events and during interviews. He kind of reminds me of Singto as being reserved with everyone else, but shows his naughty side when close friends are around. Thankfully, as him and Mean has known each other since “Make It Right”, he’s comfortable with Mean. He bullies him a bit though. LOL and I feel that there’s the intention of giving this “I’m manly” vibe from him because people just see him as cute.

I can’t blame them. Hahahahah~ Plan is such a baby face that in some pictures, he looks like a 10-year-old, seriously!!! But depending on the style of clothes and hair, and the angle (when his jawline is visible), he can look older…maybe 20.

He’s 21 now, but we gotta see. I think he’s one of those baby faces (like Koike Teppei) that even if he grows older, he would still be branded as cute because that’s just how he is.

Mean, on the other hand, seems very cheerful! Only when he’s in model mode and he’s not smiling we see the semblance with Tin.

Other than that, his voice is actually pitchier, his smile is like a cat’s, and he’s just more alert like Can’s character!

He seems a little bit shy with Plan sometimes, but I think he;s a little bit conscious when fans are teasing them as a couple. But I think they’ve been friends long enough to have a comfortable relationship. Based on what’ve snooped in socmed, Mean has addressed Plan as “E’Plan” which is more informal than “Ai’Plan” and only used for people who are very very very closed to you. The fact that Plan, who is older lets Mean address him as such speaks about their friendship well. Also, Plan seems to be more talkative online, so Mean gets shy because with intimacy, he seems to be more reserved between the two of them.

So it’s great! As bros or something more, I kinda dig the dynamics of these two. Tin and Can has obvious opposite points which makes them compatible, and I’m seeing that kind pattern with these two also. Just not as glaring.

Day 323 – 2018.19.11

First PTC down!!!

Wohoo~ 10 more to go. Five more to go for the kids I wrote the report for.

It’s strange that when I had 18 kids last year, I had to write 9 reports and I did them in a spree. Now I’m only in charge of five (my partner has 6), but I feel sooooooooooooooo lazy.

Moreover, I’m also lazy applying for the new job. So what the fuck?

The gap from the LBC fandom to another one is deafening. Huhubels.

Day 318 – 2018.14.11

First field trip with my 3s babies!

Ohoho~ It’s always exhausting going on a field trip, but I’m always happy for my little ones.

Who would have thought a trip to the supermarket can gain a whole new meaning.

It’s always a healthy thought for teachers to remember that what’s a small thing for us can be an entirely new and sparkling world to the eyes of a child.

Always try to see the world with the same wonder as them. 🙂

Day 316 – 2018.12.11

Shippers of Tin/Can are lamenting on the final, final episode with the additional 20-minute material as a “director’s cut”. Moreover, it has been officially announced that there is NO SEASON 2.

I seriously felt my world come to a stop when I learned about it.

How about Tin and Can? Why the sad ending?

I mean, I really was hoping for a season 2 moreso because the ending of Tin/Can in the series was just too upsetting.

Not at all because Can rejected Tin, but because as a season ender, and as an ender to a couple story which the fans apparently won’t see in the foreseable future, we’re left with Tin crying in the shower in anguish just because the series needed to close with a sad ending for one of the couples, according to the director. And they chose Tin/Can.

WTFFFFFFFFFFFF

“Love by Chance” the series is based on “My Accidental Love is You” wherein the main couples are AePete and TinCan. The series, on the other hand, included Techno/Klengkla from another novel of the author and Tum/Tar was just side characters in the Type/Tharn novel too. So it doesn’t make sense if the director is so “loyal” to the novel that there has to be additional couples which are, yes from the same universe, but obviously are not as connected as the main couples in terms of storyline. Of course, we can’t really blame the director for everything, especially with casting as there are bigger hands that makes the production running, but then even just in narrative, it kind of puts him in a bad light since one, Tin/Can’s pacing lacks the depth of AePete and two, it ends just…there.

I wouldn’t lament so much if they 1) ended season 1 without any season 2 with a happy TinCan. Everyone could’ve had a happy ending. AePete is still in their honeymoon, Klengkla finally got what he wanted (non-con tsk tsk), and Tar at least was able to finally make Tum as his confidant. TinCan could’ve ended in Tin’s house or them just spending a nice time eating or texting whatever. Heck, if he wanted to, he could’ve switched things up a bit with Can having the jealousy feels issue and then climaxing to the kiss. There wouldn’t be a confession from Can, not yet, but at least it makes for a dreamy possibility of them finally being officially together in the future.
Of course, it’s obvious that Can is already in love with Tin, but you can’t blame the kid for being terrified. He’s never been in love, the feelings are too strong, and he’s processing the power of another person over him. Feelings are scary!

Anyway, I wouldn’t feel so bitter about this ending if they surely had a fix-it for the TinCan story in the next season. However, there’s none, so we’re permanently left with that tragedy. I read that Thai fans are not so affected by this or some people say that anyways, canonically, Tin/Can had a happy ending.

I know. We know.

However, for me, the story is in a different medium. Though it is based on a literary piece, with the choice of medium to tell a story, then it can be considered a different narrative with a different timeline, and possibly plot and character developments. The director is “loyal” to the novel, but there’s plenty of things he didn’t do by the book. After all, as a storyteller, he has the prerogative which parts to include and not, as well as how to tell the story, right? And the series is a “pause” to the novel? What kind of bullshit is that? The novel would never be in pause because we’re not reading it. The novel, though as basis to the series, exists in its own universe. Thus, in the series, the Tin/Can story ends in tragedy.

Why the tragedy? Because it’s Tin, the man who took a risk of having his walls torn down, only for the same man to make him build it up again. He’s gone through so much, believed in friends and family only to be betrayed repeatedly and finally lose trust. Tin, who opened his heart to Can, began gaining spirit, smiling more, getting softer, showing affection, trusting, and getting his hopes up, only to be shattered by the reality that he was blinded by hope.

It’s not that he cannot trust Can, but with the rejection, he couldn’t trust Can with his happiness. That’s why he cannot take his offer to be friends. He wants more because Can has given him so much more that what he probably initially expected from him.

Some fans kind of hated Can for a while because as he was showing signs of being in love to Tin, being jealous and returning his kiss, he ought to confess his feelings and then they will officially date.

On the other hand, I understand Can. His reaction is valid. The boy is scared. He doesn’t know what’s happening to him, why it’s happening, when it started happening, and what’s going to happen. It’s going to affect his whole life, is he not allowed to feel anxious about it? Anxious enough to suddenly turn a blind eye to how it would affect Tin? I mean, I don’t think Can has bothered to really get to know Tin that well since he’s mostly avoiding being wooed. What’s definite is he has opened his doors to Tin as a friend, as an ex-enemy, as a person he wants to protect from an evil brother. Though they’ve spend time together, we don’t really know how much Can knows about Tin or what his realizations are regarding his distrust of people and as to why Tin trusts him. He doesn’t understand why Tin likes him in particular, why he thinks Can is air. He doesn’t get Tin the way the fans get Tin.

So in that rejection, it’s not only Tin who was in pain, Can similarly suffered. As fans, we suffer for them, especially with an ending like that. It would take time to heal for the both of them, for us too.

Based on the novel, Tin will ignore Can for a while (a week?), Can will feel miserable, making him lose a big soccer game, Tin will find him, Can will cry on Tin and realized he can only cry on him, realize how much he missed Tin, ask him to have sex to “forget” the pain of losing the game, then they officially date.

Uhhh.

If this is how they’ll follow up with the story and be loyal to the novel, I kind of don’t want it? It makes Can seem so selfish. He wants to forget the pain of the soccer game so he just asks Tin to sleep with him even though he rejected him already? Isn’t that cruel? Yes, Tin is an idiot for going after Can that easily and I guess for people in love that will make some sense, but being knocked out and feeling betrayed, he can’t recover that easily and just comfort Can because he needed to, right? I wish this happens after they’ve had a good talk about what to do with their relationship. It jus makes more sense and it’s healthier that way.

So now, I’m hesitant to watch the whole show again. I have this ritual of re-watching a series after I finished it, but with this ending for my ship, it will take a while before I don’t feel bitter about it anymore. It’s so sad that the last episode basically ruined the whole experience of LBC for me. It has been one of the best, most commendable series in terms of characters and dynamics, so all the more I’m claiming it a tragic ending.

Nonetheless, this is more reason for go to that fanmeet! >_<