Day 039 – 2018.08.02

There was a meme that I found years ago about “Little Asians” in grains of rice that were suppose to help repair gadgets. Of course it was kinda of funny (and also a bit racist), but then I also found out that people really do burry their (accidentally) wet gadgets in rice grains and then I was just stupified.

Anyhow, since my phone decided to plunge into water like a hungry diver into the doors of summer (shit shit shit), I immediately run to our rice container and had a short ceremony of a prayer that this shit works and to say that I’m not ready to let go.

After about nine hours, I dug up my dried phone unit and… tenen! It’s working perfectly well again! It’s not restarting every one minute and the audio was also fixed. So yay!

Thank you Little Asians. LOL.

Oh, and happy birthday today, Tita! ❤


Day 038 – 2018.07.02

Taking things into the comfort room is not a good habit, but I can’t help it. This is one of my very old habits that I don’t deem necessary to stop, so I still do it.

The thing is, whenever one carries gadgets into a comfort room without a dedicated place for it to sit safely, one puts it into the danger.

So this morning, when I carelessly placed my phone on top of our soap box and a facial wash, I’m not sure what happened, but it plunged straight into our water container–like an Olympian.

So now, my phone is still working but it’s restarting every one minute and there’s an earphone supposedly plugged in even though there’s none, so the audio are mute by default. I suppose there’s still water inside so I’m counting on the rice grain to heat it up for me while I work.

I sure as hell want a new phone, but I’m not ready to replace it yet.

Rather, my budget is not ready for any big expenses this year.

Day 037 – 2018.06.02

Sleepiness = depression, anxiety?

It’s been almost two weeks since my dad was buried, but the only explanation I can give about my chronic sleepiness is because my body is still recovering from the stress and lack of sleep I had to endure during that week.

But as I said, it’s been almost two weeks. I’m not jet lagged and I’ve had quality sleep on some days, but I still get sleepy all the time and I fall asleep quite fast. I wonder why?

When I shared about this concern, she said that I might be depressed or at least anxious about something.


Well, that’s not entirely bull. On the depressed part, I have to reflect more, but on being anxious about the future? Hell yes.

I’m anxious about my career, financial stability, not having enough time, and I think there’s a growing uneasiness–again–about not having a partner.

Growing a year older doesn’t make me grow any special, but turning 30 pressures me somehow. Like being in the 30s bracket, I’m supposed to have accomplished more than I have now. Am I anymore smarter? I know more than I did when I turned 18, or 20, or 25, but that doesn’t make me smarter.

Haaaay. Writing these thoughts down is making me sleepy again.

Day 036 – 2018.05.02

And so, we’re down to our last day in Cebu. We’ve done most of what we can in our short stay, and I rather like the laid back vibe of this trip. However, I guess since we traveled by plane to get to this city, I feel that we could’ve done more and maximize our time to do more activities and visit more places.

Mao and I rate our trips in five categories usually: transportation, company, accommodation, food, and cultural experience of the place.

Transporation: 3/5
I missed the airplane experience, but Cebu Pacific fucking us right into the entry point of this trip pulled the rating down. Also, we used Uber all the time, so the local transpo experience was immediately striked-out of memory. Nonetheless, for comfort, there’s the rating for you.

Company: 5/5
I love these set of friends: Jen, PJ, and Geli. They’ve been constant companions even if they were just my co-workers for three months. We had good serious conversations, and the laughter never waned. Most importantly, in decision-making, we had our heads in the same page most of the time.

Accommodation: 4/5
The condo rented through Airbnb was very nice. Not that spacious, but it had a great view from the 20th floor. Necessary tools in the kitchen and bathroom, and the bed were comfortable. On the other hand, I would appreciate an addition of a bidet, thicker bedsheets, and a cabinet for clothes.

Food: 5/5
We were not able to eat all the local food recommended for us, but at least we got to try the “never-miss” ones like the Cebu lechon and sea food. There’s lechon and seafood in Manila too, but the way they make it in Cebu can only be experienced if you travel there yourself.

Cultural Experience: 4/5
As my friend said, Cebu is just like Manila, except it has closer beaches and people spoke in another language. There are the historical sites, but everything has history anyway. The people were very friendly and I learned some new words in Cebuano, so that’s a treat. Nature’s beauty was a big plus to this rating. No wonder so many foreigners love visiting Cebu for its beaches.

Overall rating: 4.2/5


“Falling From the Sky” (5/5 stars, novel) – Nikki Godwin

This book was kind of a revelation from for me because I think it’s one of the first gay-themed books wherein we get the point of view from a straight guy who was falling in love with a gay man. Usually, it’s the other way around because it seems more tragic in the closet, but there’s also a story of not having any closet in the first place, but finding yourself in one–suddenly–upon falling in love.

“Falling From the Sky” is a summer love story, but I’m happy that by the end of the novel, there’s a preview of seasons after summer. Ridge found his peace in Micah, and Micah allowed himself to love again when Ridge came to Bear Creek.

There’s nothing much to note about the story, but I celebrated on the details of Ridge’s thoughts, especially over his developing attraction and feelings towards Micah, and even his family. His thoughts over his Dad’s passing was also one of the reasons I connected with Ridge easily. Also, the author’s use of the theme of “falling” as a metaphor for different events in the story was a really nice touch.

There’s a home kind of feel to this coming-of-age story. Recommended!

Day 035 – 2018.04.02

I was as dead as a corpse by 9:30 of the previous evening, so waking up at at 5:30 in the morning was not that strange. Finally, a complete sleep.

Today was our Cebu City tour. Too bad we won’t be going to the temples anymore, so we just really chilled today.

Some places we visited:

Magellan’s Cross:

This one is anti-climactic because it’s just a cross in the middle of a busy plaza. Nonetheless, I couldn’t help but get a chill when I realized the symbolism of it.

The erected cross solidified Catholicism in the Philippines and the power of Spain over the Philippines. So without that cross, the history of the Philippines would have been completely different, for better or worse.

Fort San Pedro

Looks like Intramuros so nothing very new here. But there’s great paintings and photographs, so that’s good.

We took a break to eat lunch, so we hunted for a nearby Cebu Lechon place. The one we found was a humble one inside a grocery store, but it seemed popular enough to be easily filled with people for lunch and take out. We ordered half a kilo of lechon and lechon dinuguan. Of course, there’s the puso (hanged rice).

Verdict? Well, we know now why Cebu lechon is hailed and venerated compared to lechon elsewhere in the Philippines. I’m not sure how they do it, but they include some special erbs or something in it. It’s just so so so tasty! And they don’t use Mang Tomas as the sauce for it, instead it’s really the mix of soysauce and vinegar. The softness of it melts in your mouth.

One of the most unusual here is that they don’t give utensils, instead, they give plastic gloves. The food is turned instantly very Pinoy when you’re welcomed to eat with your hands. That was great.

Now that we’re stuffed, the tour continues!

Archdiocesan Museum:

I’m not a practicing Catholic, but museums are always a good place to visit, especially when there’s a (cute) tour guide telling your interesting historical details. So that was great. I especially like the information about relics.

Yap-Santiago Ancestral House

The curator said that the house is already more then 300 years and the family still sleep there from time to time to continue what it is originally–a house. The place was full of old house wares and things, but it looks very homey.

It was too hot in the afternoon, so we went home to rest before going out for dinner at Larsians.

In Larsians, we ate lots of puso (28 of them!) and scrumptious barbeque. The chicken skin, pusit with leaks inside, and the buttered holyshiit-I’m coming boneless bangus almost was the death of me. I wanted to cry with the deliciousness of it. SERIOUSLY.

After crying over the fact that I’m gonna miss my BB (buttered bangus) when I leave tomorrow, we head on to Shamrack to buy food souveniers. Believe it or not, I think I spent most on food over personal shopping for this trip.

Well, I don’t really regret that. WEEEEEE~

Day 034 – 2018.03.02

Perhaps he universe wanted me to be more hyped over this Cebu trip, so he played a trick on me.

I don’t regularly check my emails, but I did on a Friday night, around 10 PM. Opened the wrong account for the one I’m looking for, but the right one to receive the message from Cebu Pacific: You have been rebooked to a later flight.

It was almost an hour of fighting the urge to flip everything and everyone, but after almost 30 minutes of arrangement, we got a 3 AM flight instead of a 9:30 AM which was our original time.

By the time I finished the transaction, it was already 11:30 in the evening, I was not finished packing and I had no sleep yet. I had to be with my friends at 1:30 to go to the airport and check in by 2 AM.


Anyhow, we survived everything. Flight was smooth, I was able to catch some Zs while in transit, and Cebu welcomed us with gloomy skies.

I caught myself at the brink of crying and my heart clenched a bit when I was walking at the airport and seeing ground crews.

I remember dad.

He used to work at the airport. He used to wear those neon-colored vests probably or the neon-colored jumper, and he used to ride those trucks for the plane’s fuel. I wondered how he moved around as a ground’s man. Every single personen with a vest reminded me of Dad.

I knew then, I’m always going to have mixed feelings being at the airport.

Anyhow, later we had breakfast at Chowking and planned from there. By around 9 AM, we got a deal to visit some islands in Mactan to snorkel and swim.

I’m not big on waters, but I like what nature shows me from beaches or inside a boat, so I’d still say it was a great experience.

The water was very clean and clear, so it was easy to spot fish and other children of the ocean even without disturbing them in the water.

After leaving the area of Lapu-lapu going into Cebu City, I noticed that the jeeps are different from the ones in Manila. They like small owner-typed jeepneys, so they are narrower inside.

They are pained in solid colors of red, green, blue, etc. and absent of the details of a traditional jeep. A local explained that it’s not because of the jeepney policy which is a national issue now, it’s just what it had always been in Cebu. It’s a unique flavor of the place then.

I also noticed that the Uber drivers are really friendly. I guess they are used to the tourists. Actually, most of the people we have interacted with so far are really friendly! Also, there’s this lingering familiarity of Manila, but when I started hearing Cebuano everywhere, I’m reminded that I’m indeed in a trip in the Visayas.

So over all, I like this trip so far. 🙂

Day 032 – 2018.01.02

Finally. Finaaallllyyyyy~~~~~ I’ve finished reading this Simon book.



I’m usually not happy to finish reading a story if they are good, like there’s the feeling of accomplishment for being able to focus and just read, but then you’ve grown somehow attached to the characters that you don’t want to say goodbye just yet, but then there’s this book with all the unnecessary dialogues–internal and external–that I’m like, yasssssss, we done here!

It was only half of the book when the plot seemed to be moving. Yes, Simon’s friends are important to his development as a person, but then there’s too many details about them which are unnecessary for the plot to move. The conflict was established immediately, like in the first chapter, and then it only moved by half of the book. The next parts of it felt like fillers instead.

I just wanted to know who was Blue because the email exchanges were very nice, at least.

So I’ll just look forward to the movie. At least, in the limitations of the medium to not include some internal dialogues, I’ll be saved from them with the story still in tact.

Simon Versus the Homo Sapiens Agenda” (novel) – 3/5 stars

Day 031 – 2018.31.01

Kindle broke my heart–again
(the relationship)

I’ve never been in a real relationship, so I can’t really miss or mourn for something I never have, but I’ve been in numerous relationships with gadgets I’ve grown to really love and be attached with, so in retrospect, yes, I’ve had my heart broken.

Twice, by the same thing.

You see, I made a djzsdbfkjsdbfknd;jgbdf;jgbld of a post when my Kindle, Sir Benedict, suddenly summons into life after suddenly deciding to give me the cold shoulder (unresponsive screen) without a clear clue of what I could have done wrong. It was like I was happily living in the relationship, but the love had become one-sided, and I was blind about it.

But I negotiated. I tried my best to revive it using various ways the Internet suggested (wall charging, hard resetting, factory reset, etc.), but alas, no response.

So I gave it space. I left it alone for a few days, but in between breaths and work, I prayed that it will come back. After some time I checked on it again. Perhaps it will come back to life–to me–just as suddenly as it died on me.

But it didn’t.

So I decided. Perhaps, it was time to move on.

Despite missing it, I looked for others, for replacements. Something cheaper, something that others have enjoyed, but Sir Benedict will always be the focal point. It’s like life before and after it. I even went back to physical books, thinking it was a better distraction because physical books and kindle, have different feels.

One day, after almost a month, I missed Sir Benedict. Just trying my chance, just one time, with a spark of hope, I reconnected with it.

And it responded to my fingers. My Kindle was warm to me again!

I was happy. Elated! I couldn’t believe it for the love of me. How could it be?! But then, it didn’t matter. What mattered is that it was back, and I wanted to be more careful this time around.

Whenever I held it, whenever I opened it, there’s this lingering paranoia that it will say goodbye suddenly like last time. I made sure not to take it out, to put it down oh so carefully, and hold my breath whenever I wake it from sleep. I was in constant fear of losing it again.

Because now I know it can.
It will.
If it wanted to.
It will break my heart again.

And it did.

I was reading a fanfic one night when it suddenly decided to once again give me the cold shoulder.

This time, my earth didn’t shatter as much as the first time it happened. It felt like I was waiting for it to happened. And it was sad to realize that.

Oh, so very sad.

For the second time, this Kindle broke my heart.