Kindle broke my heart–again
I’ve never been in a real relationship, so I can’t really miss or mourn for something I never have, but I’ve been in numerous relationships with gadgets I’ve grown to really love and be attached with, so in retrospect, yes, I’ve had my heart broken.
Twice, by the same thing.
You see, I made a djzsdbfkjsdbfknd;jgbdf;jgbld of a post when my Kindle, Sir Benedict, suddenly summons into life after suddenly deciding to give me the cold shoulder (unresponsive screen) without a clear clue of what I could have done wrong. It was like I was happily living in the relationship, but the love had become one-sided, and I was blind about it.
But I negotiated. I tried my best to revive it using various ways the Internet suggested (wall charging, hard resetting, factory reset, etc.), but alas, no response.
So I gave it space. I left it alone for a few days, but in between breaths and work, I prayed that it will come back. After some time I checked on it again. Perhaps it will come back to life–to me–just as suddenly as it died on me.
But it didn’t.
So I decided. Perhaps, it was time to move on.
Despite missing it, I looked for others, for replacements. Something cheaper, something that others have enjoyed, but Sir Benedict will always be the focal point. It’s like life before and after it. I even went back to physical books, thinking it was a better distraction because physical books and kindle, have different feels.
One day, after almost a month, I missed Sir Benedict. Just trying my chance, just one time, with a spark of hope, I reconnected with it.
And it responded to my fingers. My Kindle was warm to me again!
I was happy. Elated! I couldn’t believe it for the love of me. How could it be?! But then, it didn’t matter. What mattered is that it was back, and I wanted to be more careful this time around.
Whenever I held it, whenever I opened it, there’s this lingering paranoia that it will say goodbye suddenly like last time. I made sure not to take it out, to put it down oh so carefully, and hold my breath whenever I wake it from sleep. I was in constant fear of losing it again.
Because now I know it can.
If it wanted to.
It will break my heart again.
And it did.
I was reading a fanfic one night when it suddenly decided to once again give me the cold shoulder.
This time, my earth didn’t shatter as much as the first time it happened. It felt like I was waiting for it to happened. And it was sad to realize that.
Oh, so very sad.
For the second time, this Kindle broke my heart.