“If we can love someone so much, how will we be able to handle it the one day when we are separated? And, if being separated is a part of life, and you know about separation well…is it possible that we can love someone and never be afraid of losing them? At the same time I was wondering if it is possible that, we can live our entire life without loving anyone at all?”
That’s Mew’s question about life and love as he was left with more loneliness after his grandmother died and was left alone to live on.
I don’t know why “Love of Siam” has such a big impact on me. This film which I downloaded a copy out of mere excitement that I’ve stumbled on another gay movie. A few months (or a year) later, I watched some parts of the film until I finished it. I cried the first time. I re-watched the movie from beginning to end and found myself sobbing like a part of myself died while the credits of the film rolled. I couldn’t help it, the ending broke my heart.
The Love of Siam (Thai: รักแห่งสยาม, RTGS: Rak Haeng Sayam) is a multi-layered family drama that includes a romance between two teenage boys. I admit of getting a copy due to this element, but I was more than happy to find out that this movie has more to offer than just a feed to my fujoshi-heart. It deals with tragedies, sexual awakenings and other things a young adult deals within his environment, including peer pressure and responsibilities to family. No wonder it won so many awards, including Best Picture.
I think I’ll never be able to forget this movie as it has now awakened my interest in Thai culture, starting with its other great films to offer.
I’d have to say the actors contributed a lot to the success of this movie. The actress who played Tong’s mother Sunee, Sinjai Plengpanich, is said to be one of the best actresses in Thailand. I think it’s true. Every time she appears in a scene, the loneliness and pain of a distressed mother struggling with her family’s tragedies and her effort to show strength, gives the scene a heavy feeling and the characters interacting with her character is easily dragged by this aura, making the scene effective. A mother who has to deal with a depressed alcoholic husband, a missing daughter and a son whom she discovers to be struggling with his own sexuality might, at most times, would be seen always breaking down in tears or edging sanity. But Sinjai’s acting gave light to this character who showed her strength with silence and carefulness with her own tears, gave us access to the character’s pain through her eyes. I was so impressed with this actress that I wonder how she fairs in other movies. Aside from that, she is really beautiful.
As for Tong and Mew, Mario Maurice and Witwisit Hiranyawongkul respectively, I think they also gave justice to their own characters. Even the younger actors of their roles did great in acting, especially the little Mew who needed to show an internal struggle with loneliness because of his own family and his building interest with his playful neighbor Tong, whom was equally suffering due to his sister missing one day in Chiangmai. Meanwhile, I would say that Mario impressed me with his acting especially in that scene with Ying, wherein he broke down crying while he confesses his own confusion about his sexual identity, mixed with the pressure his friends had indirectly pressed on him. Witwisit (or Pitch, nickname) I think gave a good performance as well, maybe also because his demeanor really suits the character of Mew who lives quietly by himself and music. Based on the profile written about him in Wiki, I think his character is not really far from Mew as he really sings for a band and creates music in his free time. He also is not that fond of his own popularity that many misunderstands him as a snob.
The chemistry of Mario and Witwisit in the movie was so great that it was funny to read that they weren’t that friendly towards one another in the set. They even admitted of having cold feet due to the kissing scene in the movie. Well, I think they did well and they were very natural in those moments their characters had to interact with each other in more than friendly manners. Now this makes me think if it was just the ambiance in their scenes that made Tong and Mew’s moment so effin great or if they really just acted great with each other. I guess I’d settle with both, then. ^^
There are a lot of parts in this movie I’d say was very memorable for me, but I think my favorite would be the end where we can see Mew putting the last piece of Tong’s gift to him, completing the wooden toy. He sits on his bed and say’s “Thank You” (to Tong), perhaps with the memories they made together, the love he was able to experience with him, and for loving him despite the fact that they can’t be together as lovers. Since Mew’s character sort of mirror’s Sunne’s character of wanting to stay strong to the point that they quietly shut their world to build themselves back without others seeing their vulnerability, this scene shows Mew crying his heart out. I feel so sorry for Mew that I wanted to hug him. Seriously. Maybe because I thought that if I was Mew, I know that I would be able to move on with my life because I have friends. But then I go home to an empty house, with my mind constantly flying to the images of those people I lost, to that person I can’t be with. I’m alone and I have the right to be lonely. Who would comfort me when I am alone, trying to make music about love without loving?
I think that made me cry. I suddenly remember that time I went to watch a Japanese movie with my co-workers and was surprised to see our QA crying over a scene in the movie when a grandfather made his wife’s death robe. When I asked him why he cried because of that, he said he couldn’t help but place himself in the shoes of the character. I didn’t understand it then, but now I totally can.
And maybe it’s a play of fate that I stumbled upon a documentary about missing children in the Philippines. According to a child psychologist, it is more painful for parents who have missing children than dead children, because there is no closure. They live with the pain, the guilt, and regrets. They have to go on living and hoping one day they will be reunited with the ones they lost one day without a trace. This part of the movie was clearly seen with the situation of Tong’s family.
*sigh*
This entry sounds like crap, when I actually wanted to make a decent movie review. Maybe next time, when I don’t feel heavy anymore.
Alright, that was actually a movie review I wrote five years ago from my old blog I thought that I’ve lost the contents since the website shut down for a while. It’s not the best writing I have, but I think this writing is much more honest and descriptive than I could ever be now. Since I’m on a Thai-entertainment high these days, I might as well post this review here. 🙂
*downloads the director’s cut*
Such is Life // 